PAIN!!

This is something I've never sought to escape or run away from. I've never once drunk alcohol or did a drug to escape from pain or depression [and "feel good/happy" temporarily].

I've experienced the pain of heartaches and other emotional pains in the past, even physical pain. But I dunno if it's just me, but I stand up and face it straight. Even recently God only knows how painful it is to see Fe. in her high/depressed/indon'tknowwhat spells.

But alas I'm me and I don't brood over the past etc. Every bit of pain I've felt makes me who I am now...I've felt, learned, and grown from it. Pain is prolly one of the few things that reminds me I'm human or alive ...trying to escape from it is like trying to deny my existence.

Here's a Buddhist quote on Happiness:

I believe all suffering is caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of their happiness or satisfaction. Yet true happiness comes from a sense of peace and contentment, which in turn must be achieved through the cultivation of altruism, of love and compassion, and elimination of ignorance, selfishness, and greed.

Selfish is something I'll never be and just because I "love" someone doesn't mean I have any business in being with them [that's selflessness to the core there]

Some peoples definitions of "love" can honestly send me off the psychotic end of things [I literally die of sadistic laughter inside when I hear some people bitch and complain] and yes my mind is a very dark place...I'm pretty sure some people would go insane if they had to deal with the level of chaos existing in my mind, but hey I keep it in check.

I'll love everyone equally so it doesn't matter who I end up with in life [if anyone] once we have a mutual feeling for one another I'm content.

But hey, that's just me.. I try to be selfless, caring and I've never once told a major lie I think. Usually it's petty joking lies where and tell the person the truth 10 seconds later and MOST IMPORTANTLY I NEVER LIE TO MYSELF [quite unhealthy nay?]

Health - the physical, mental and social well being of an individual....oh bio how I miss thee. Funny how someone who does and loves Bio. up till form 6 ends up in engineering!

Hopefully I get a job and get paid and such...and I'll be nice to people still and be actually able to buy stuff for people [outta the goodness of my heart and not anything else]. But as of now I live off my fathers money and try not to waste it on shit.

Quote From Batman Gotham Knight:

Batman: Something's wrong, my vision's twisted all inside out. Crock bit me. I think hes got the Scarecrow's fear toxin boiling inside his veins....infected me with it.

Commissioner Gordon: Are you in Pain?

Batman: I Work Through Pain!